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Q & A on borderline issue

1 Comment

Albert, your post today really resonates with me and puts something into words that I have been seaching for – that is, seeing the person as caught in the narcissistic phase of development, which comes from an inability to understand their pre-verbal drives, and who sees conflicts as ‘out there’ rather than ‘in here’, and so is looking outside of itself for answers, because he can not decipher the messages that are coming to him internally. You say that the messages that come internally are experienced as foreign and therefore the tendency is to act on the outside world rather than on the internal conflict that is perpetual. Is this due to the lack of holding, and psychological containing as an infant by the care-giver, who could not help the infant decipher the ‘inside’ messages and so they remain ‘foreign and inaccessible?

How do you help with this developmental/pre-verbal conflict that has not had resolution? I ask this because I recognise this in myself, the seeking of approval from others, the defining of myself through my connection or communication with others, and now , slowly, through analysis and art-making, starting to find the core ‘me’ inside myself, that grounds me in my being, rather than through being mirrorred by others.


Author: aldussault

I am an artist, photographer, watercolorist, and primarily a modern psychoanalyst. I blog about politics and consciousness as well as create digital fine art photos of my pen & inks and my water colorings. My hobby is studying piano.

One thought on “Q & A on borderline issue

  1. Well first of all, symptoms alone are not enough to tell the whole picture. The borderline line patient experiences life as dangerous and as such they need to maintain a vigilance with the egoic defenses. We have been taught that a big ego is narcissistic… but it seems to me, in my work over the years that being a narcissist is almost the opposite of what we hear tell about the disorder…the narcissistic defense is used to place someone else as the most important person in your psyche…in fac,t narcissism is actually about being more concerned about the feelings of The Other [Lacan], thant about ones own feelings….the narcissist fears hurting someone, but that very fear becomes the source of pain.

    Feelings, that is the sensations that arise and are traditionally labeled anxiety or depression are actually messages from the organism that does not speak….we register the feelings as some kind of pain that we want to get rid of rather than as a message that requires our attention. It is a classes killing of the messenger.

    One exits from narcissism through no longer trying to rid the organism of anxiety, but rather listening closely to what the anxiety could possibly mean….think of anxiety in the borderline as a caution light, if yellow one ought to look all ways and then proceed. Yellow does not mean stop and panic.

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